Joy—Thad

Joy and Thad’s relationship is defined by betrayal and its consequences: Joy’s account links her HIV diagnosis during pregnancy to Thad’s other relationships, and he left before their daughter, Tyffanie, was born. His absence shaped both Joy’s early motherhood and her return east with the baby.

Relationship and Pregnancy

Joy learned she was HIV-positive during Tyffanie’s pregnancy, a period she had expected to be among the happiest of her life. In her letter, she connected the diagnosis to Thad’s behavior with other partners, saying he had not been as careful as he claimed. The account presents his conduct as the source of a crisis Joy had to face while preparing to become a mother.

The uncertainty extended to Tyffanie. Doctors tested the baby three times—twice in California and once in New Hampshire—and believed she was likely free of the virus, but advised continued testing until she was eighteen months old. Joy held on to that possibility; it was, at times, what kept her from despair.

Thad’s Departure

Thad had full-blown AIDS and left for Mexico during Joy’s seventh month of pregnancy with another man, pursuing a treatment unavailable or unapproved in the United States. When Joy asked for help, he said he needed his money for his own treatment, and the two had a major fight. His illness provides context for his departure, but the account also makes clear that he offered no support to Joy as she faced the pregnancy and its uncertainty.

Thad never saw Tyffanie. His absence made his claim on the role of father starkly nominal: Joy’s account compares him unfavorably with her own father, underscoring a pattern of men failing to take responsibility for the children whose lives they helped shape.

Joy’s Return East

After a serious conflict with her mother and her mother’s husband, Joy drove east alone with Tyffanie. The journey was difficult; caring for the baby meant frequent stops, sometimes in places where Joy felt uncomfortable. She spent more money than she had planned, but was glad she had made the trip. She intended to move back to Three Rivers at the end of the month, and part of her visit was devoted to arranging somewhere to stay.

Significance

The relationship’s consequences persist beyond its breakdown. Joy’s diagnosis, Thad’s departure, and the uncertainty surrounding Tyffanie’s health turn an intimate betrayal into a practical and ongoing burden that Joy carries largely by herself. Her return east marks a move toward support and a new arrangement for her and her daughter, while Thad remains absent from Tyffanie’s life.